


Only Her

by wisia



Series: For You [3]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst, F/M, Identity Reveal, Kissing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-07
Updated: 2016-02-07
Packaged: 2018-05-18 18:47:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5939332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wisia/pseuds/wisia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He needs her to know his name. Adrien needs Marinette to know.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Only Her

**Author's Note:**

> Identity reveal. More angst. Not sure if I’ll write a fourth part or not. Maybe I will so it’ll have a happy ending.
> 
> [This one rifts off the second part, but it should be okay to read even without reading it.]

He sees Marinette.

He doesn’t know how to approach her.

God, Adrien never wanted to know. Not like this. He thinks, he pretends. He can pretend he doesn’t know. That the lady he loves sits behind him.

“I’m glad,” Marinette says, and Adrien can’t help it. His nerves are shot, and every night he sees her face. See his Lady take off her miraculous, revealed before him finally. It was a nightmare he never knew.

It ranks just below the ones losing her.

“Are you?” he asks.

“Uh, y-yes.” She’s forcing it. “It’s, um, wonderful. Ladybug is cool, and you, ah.”

She stutters, and Adrien wonders why she can’t speak to him. Why she can’t speak to Adrien? It’s because she doesn’t know, and he wants to tell her. It’s on the tip of his tongue. I’m Chat Noir, he thinks. Your terrible partner who couldn’t help you. Aren’t you apaw-ed?

He doesn’t say it. He looks at her, and it shouldn’t have been her. He wants—he wants this one back, and his heart hurts.

“I like the old Ladybug. I think Chat Noir prefers her back too.”

He means it to be a reassurance.

She leaves instead.

***************

Adrien keeps expecting to see her.

His Lady. His wonderful own Ladybug.

Not that this girl isn’t his Ladybug, but it’s not the same. This girl doesn’t know Adrien like Marinette did. He keeps expecting her to fill in the gaps, the way that Marinette would. He’ll slide that way, and she’ll go the other. Or she’ll know exactly what Chat is thinking, how they’ll move in sync to get that akuma.

She doesn’t.

She is painfully young, and Adrien knows he shouldn’t compare them.

“It’s not the same,” Adrien says and has been saying for days now. His shoulder hurts, and it is going to bruise badly. He doesn’t know how he’s going to reach that section with the concealer. There is only so much coverage he can get on his own, even with Plagg helping.

“No,” the kwami says. He chews down his cheese and gives Adrien a serious answer for once. “It’s not. You’re not the first one to lose a Ladybug.”

Plagg speaks with pain, and Adrien realizes—it must hurt them too. How many times have a kwami lost a Chat Noir or a Ladybug and had to relearn a new one before their grief or loss could settle in.

He thinks—he should ask how they handled it. How do you work with someone who didn’t know you?

He doesn’t and hands Plagg another slice of cheese.

Maybe that’s why he almost gets thrown off the tower. Or how he just barely hangs on, hoping he didn’t fall to his death after everything. They weren’t in sync, weren’t on the same page.

The girl barely saves him, swinging in with her yo-yo and grabs him, and in his panic—he sees his Lady.

“My Lady,” he gasps, so glad. So grateful that everything is right.

It isn’t. Not quite.

Adrien only remembers when he can focus enough to see that brown ponytail instead of the usual two pigtails tied with red ribbons.

“S-sorry,” she stutters, and she strains with his weight. She can’t hold him, and—

They drop to the concrete, and it’s hard. He shields her the best she can, nearly breaking his back, and her scent at this proximity stuns him. She doesn’t smell like confection sugar. Not the way that his Lady smells with wind on her skin and…

It takes longer than he needs to stand.

“It’s fine.” He pauses. “You’re new. You’ll learn, so don’t, don’t worry about it.”

“But—“ she bites her lips, and she is painfully young.

“How old are you?” Adrien asks, and he feels so far away.

“Thirteen,” she says, and it’s really not much younger than when he started. Adrien doesn’t know how he did it. How they did it.

He points to himself and smiles. “You know how many lives I have? Four, five now. I didn’t get here overnight.”

Adrien doesn’t know if it helps. All he knows is he can’t make puns around her.

“Let’s get that akuma,” and the girl nods. She looks to him for direction, and it isn’t a partnership.

******

He shouldn’t be here.

Adrien doesn’t have the right to be there, not when he couldn’t help his Lady. He toys with his ring, wills the green paw to drop and make it count down. He wants her to know.

Plagg is too well fed for it, and Adrien—

He enters, and the look on her face is worried. He thought she looked thinner, and—

Adrien sees it then. He saw her room once. Full of his image (it made him smiled, to have a devoted fan), and they’re gone. Sprawled across her walls are maps and data. It’s consuming her.

“Ladybug—“

“I’m not your Ladybug.”

That stings. He takes a deep breath and forces himself to relax. There was always only one truth for him, even if he didn’t know she was Marinette.

“You’ll always be my Ladybug, my wonderful Lady.”

And this is wrong of him too. He asks, and she gives.

She gave so much already, but he can’t let it go. It’s sick, a violation to know, but Adrien still asks. Still takes it.

She kisses him.

Her lips are sweet against his, and he wants more.

Adrien’s clumsy with it. He dives into her mouth, tastes her, memorizes her and wants.

“Chat,” she breathes, and he doesn’t want her to say that name.

“My name,” Adrien says, and she shudders. Her pupils are dilated, and her mouth is parted just so.

“Chat,” she says again.

“No. My name…my real name. Please.” He begs. At least, let him do this. If it’s the only right thing he can do, it’s this. He slides his hand up, her hand against his is so delicate even though he knows they’re stronger than they look. Adrien kisses the tips of her fingers, and he would drown in her blue eyes.

Marinette’s eyes squeeze shut. “I can’t.”

“Why not?” he says, and she pulls back in recoil. Her chair hits her desk.

“I’m--,” he grasps for words. All his puns and witticism couldn’t save him now. “Look. You’re looking at him. Do you think Hawkmoth wouldn’t know that you’re trying to find him? If I could stop you, I would.”

Because Marinette was in danger, even if he didn't put her there or want her there. He can only protect her the best he could.

“Chat,” and she tugs him down. Kisses him hard. It isn’t enough. It isn’t an answer.

She kisses him fiercely, and he doesn’t know how it happens. His hands are under her shirt, and the sounds she makes is just so.

He’s in her bed and staring up into her blue, blue eyes.

“Marinette,” he whispers.

She looks down at him, and it doesn’t go to where he expects.

“I fail you,” she says. “Dear god, I failed you.”

He feels her shake, but no words come to his mouth.

“I failed you,” she says again and cries into his chest. He strokes her hair, and then he can speak.

“I’m here,” he says. “I told you I’m still here.”

He cradles her for as long as he can, and then his ring beats. The first warning, and Marinette stills completely.

“Please,” he asks again. He can’t bear it if she says no, if she refuses it again. Adrien will do it. He could never refuse her, but it’s…

She doesn’t say anything, and the ring beats again a minute later.

Adrien waits, heart beating fast. He waits for her to move, to close her eyes or to—

He lets Plagg go before the last notes could beep.

“Adrien,” she says, and there’s a look in her eyes full of wonder. Confusion.

“Yes. Marinette, I—“

“Adrien,” she says, and she kisses him again.

It’s his name on her lips, and he sinks into her mouth. Wraps her against him, and he really would never have any other Lady but her. It was only her.


End file.
